Photoblogs and Pedophilia
Posted by RazorsKissJul 14
7/16
Mommy Brain, Keer Unplugged, My Own Thoughts, Gigowski Gibberish, and The Common Room have also weighed in.
7/15
Carla Wolfe, Chris, and Sal have all posted on this topic as well.
After reading blestwithsons’ post, and the post that inspired it, I’ve mulled over some of the conclusions, and I’m forced to say that I agree with some, disagree with others.
This post, due to it’s title, will now get some interesting traffic, I’m sure – which is fine. That’s why I titled it as such. Better me pulling search engine traffic for this than an actual pedo photoblog… so, neener.
When we post picture of our kids online, we should worry about pedophiles. To an extent. To another extent, I don’tthink the risks outweigh the benefits.
So, what rules should we set, when we post them?
1. No naked pictures – period. This should go without saying – but I’ve noticed a tendency to post pictures of babies in only diapers, kids in bathtubs, et al. Don’t do it. That’s common sense, folks.
Perhaps youโre even unwittingly serving up your most precious things in life as masturbation fodder for internet perverts. I realize that sounds rough and crass but for those of you who know the world and recognize the rules of the street, that is precisely the kind of scenario you risk when you place images of your children online. – (Urban Semiotic)
2. For heaven’s sake, don’t give out too much personal info. City, state, whatever – that may be fine, unless you live in a small town, where it’s *obviously* you. That’s also common sense. However, add in your name, their names, and pictures of your street sign, your house number… that’s not very smart. Don’t do it.
Parents are also sloppy about leaving clues on the internet. Blogs and websites are filled with easy ways to hunt down children via parental carelessness. Many blogs openly pony up first and last names of family members, jobs, city and state, hobbies and even the full names of the children! – (Urban Semiotic)
Ok? Those are two very simple rules, that if followed, should be very commonsensical. That’s where I agree. However – I also disagree with several things that are brought up.
In the source article that is referenced, the gist seems to be that any image can be photoshopped in, and turned into a “nasty” image. Well, folks, I’ll tell you. They don’t need the intarwebs to get pictures. They can get a digital camera, go to the park, and snap to their heart’s content. They can get 100 pictures at the mall, or of everyday life at Wal-Mart. They don’t need your pictures. They only need their fantasies. You can’t stop their fantasies.
They, most likely, won’t put the effort into photoshopping a picture of a kid climbing a tree into something nasty. If they want nasty, there are Asian sites, or eastern European sites, which deal in sex-trafficking – of children. They are slaves. That is where the child porn industry gets it’s “hard” material.
What they are warning you to do is to take *every single picture of your children off the internet*. That, in my humble opinion, is using a hammer to crush an ant. If they have to go to the effort of photoshopping a picture into something nasty – it’s not even real anymore. It’s not your child anymore, and it ceases to be your child as soon as they alter the image. They know it isn’t real. They want *real*. Crass? Yup. True? Yup.
I can understand the point about kids naked in the bathtub, ok? However, I really think it’s a bit much to say that every single picture, because there is a minuscule probability that it might be photoshopped into something else entirely, should be removed, in order that your “child” (ie: the child that is no longer your child, as they’ve had to alter it) does not get on the intarwebs that way. It’s overkill.
While I appreciate the effort to educate – I also think it induces a bit of hysteria, right along with it. YES, refrain from posting personal information about your children. YES, refrain from letting them appear, even partially nude, on your blog. NO, do not refrain from all pictures because some may be abused, and NO, do not assume that because abuse can happen, that the solution is to never post another picture of your child.
If you submit to that sort of thinking, I might humbly posit that you are succumbing to a spirit of fear. When we succumb to a spirit of fear, we may lose sight of our calling. We may hide ourselves under that bushel, and thus dim the light that could otherwise shine. We have nothing to hide- especially not our children. We should, indeed, protect them. We should, indeed, ensure that they are not taken advantage of. You and I should, indeed, “Be on guard for yourselves and for all the flock, among which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to shepherd the church of God which He purchased with His own blood.” (Acts 20:28)
Look, I’m not telling you to just go on, happy-go-lucky, and ignore any dangers the internet may have to offer. I worked for a group called Cyberangels, a good while back. I know about online predators, ok? Posting pictures of kids playing is much different than allowing your 13-year-old daughter to chat on IRC, in the adult rooms. They are worlds apart. I understand about these “underbelly freaks” David is speaking of. They, however, are much more likely to frequent child beauty pageants, or kids in the bathtub (like I said… parents can be very, very unwise).
Don’t freak out and go overboard. Don’t be unwise, either. Be as wise as a serpent, and as gentle as a dove. Seriously – don’t go to either extreme. Wisely consider the risks, weigh the benefits, and go from there.
Risks – possible online predators
Benefits – showing the world a happy family
We SHOULD safeguard our children. We should, however, not remove ourselves FROM the world, but be an example TO the world. Show your children to the world- responsibly, but without fear. Show them happy, show them healthy, show them with the knowledge that their joy comes from the Father of Lights, especially when raised by parents who are Children of God.
12 comments
Comment by blestwithsons on July 14, 2005 at 6:44 am
Excellent post. And you have good points… But my blog was not materially damaged by removing the pics anyway. Plus I did have some of them in only diapers or swimsuits that definitely needed to go away. Now for someone who is primarily focusing on a picturesque life… I can understand a stronger reluctance to remove the pics. ๐
Obviously you’re more up on this subject than I am… but I am by nature rather paranoid anyway. ๐
Comment by Kris on July 14, 2005 at 7:31 am
Thank you for your common-sense and balanced response to a blog that truly did give me a spirit of fear. I deleted every one of my childrenโs photos off my blog late last night and into the am hours. The last and hardest photo to delete was a recent close-up of my daughter’s face and hands turned up in joyful worship to the Lord at Vacation Bible School. It was an awesome photo which I found extremely difficult to delete. Now I have to wonder, did I let unnecessary fear dilute my/her testimony to God? You definitely game me food for thought.
Comment by Catez on July 14, 2005 at 9:16 am
I agree with being sensible, and I don’t think people should never put pics of their kids on their blogs.
I wouldn’t say those pics show the world a happy family though. They show the world a photo. Who knows what the family is really like. No offence, and I hope they are happy families, but a photo doesn’t tell much in that regard.
So I’d say be careful when wanting to show people your family – which is done primarily for the benefit of friends and regular readers of a blog. I agree – nudity and so on isn’t wise. But yes, if the pedophiles want pics they can download far worse – or snap their own, as many do.
Comment by Frank on July 14, 2005 at 1:19 pm
Nice intelligent and well reasoned post on a topic that is prone with extremest views on both sides. Great job, as normal, and your work should benefit everyone that reads it.
I do not have kids, but I work with college aged adults at church, so I am concerned about older teens and young adults as well. I would suggest those in that age group follow the same reasoniable “guidelines” when posting personal / vacation / mission pics and info as well. No reason to not do it, but be careful, be cautious and do not leave all the clues needed to find you. There are a lot of people on the web, most are descent, the few that are not though warrent our thought and some actions, but do not warrent us becoming afraid of being ourselves and sharing our lives with the world.
Again great job, great tips.
Comment by Carla on July 14, 2005 at 3:39 pm
Good post, and very balanced. You mentioned you worked with Cyberangels a while back. I haven’t heard that organization’s name in a long time – but they were one of the first out there, in full combat as it were, around the time of the much-forgotten “Vito” case in 93-96.
I’ve also been around the cyber-block, and what you say is very solid. Thanks for the insight, I hope folks pay attention.
SDG – Carla
Comment by blestwithsons on July 14, 2005 at 8:41 pm
I keep coming back to my first comment and worrying that it sounded… I dunno, not friendly. I hope that’s not the case.
I’ve mentioned this post in several comment threads by the way – including the one on my own post. I’m recommending people read this, as well as David’s, in order to get a balanced perspective.
Comment by RazorsKiss on July 14, 2005 at 11:09 pm
blest – Nah, it didn’t sound that way. Don’t worry about it. Thanks for the comments! I wasn’t trying to blast anyone, incidentally. I just wanted to try and temper the “panic factor” a bit, if I could. Since the original post seemed, to me, to rely quite heavily on the yuck factor Joe Carter mentioned not too long ago, I wanted to give a perspective from someone who’s been involved in cyber-stalking, and tracking ‘net pedophiles. Thus, the post. It was an interesting piece to write, and you all got to find out something about me you may not have known ๐ So, it was all good.
Catez – On the internet, the visual form is the most compelling form of communication. Sight transfers more in a glance than many words ever can. That was mostly my point on the “show your happy family” portion. Kids smiling and playing bring a smile to anyone’s lips – and it should. Kids just… are.
I know what you mean. I think you know what I meant, too, though. ๐
Frank – Yes, it’s always good to safeguard ourselves, and teens/young teens need to be very careful themselves. That subject is pretty well covered though, by many people, so I didn’t want to diverge too far off topic to hit it very hard ๐ Thanks for the comments!
Carla – Yeah, CA was fun. Lots of drama, though, about the time the org had a pretty split, in 2000 or so. I still have friends who run their own group, and I talk to people from CA occasionally, but very infrequently. They’re a good bunch. Run the safest channels on IRC, bar none.
Comment by Andrea R on July 15, 2005 at 7:37 am
Just surfing by.. thought this post was VERY well done. I’ve been online for 5+ years, blogging away, and have even shared pics of my kids. But like you said, I’ve used common sense. And I refuse to live my life fearfully. ๐
Comment by Splashman on July 16, 2005 at 4:21 am
Thanks for a great post. I came here via The Common Room, which also linked David Boles and Blest. I read David Boles first, and had an immediate gut reaction: “OMG!” I felt fear. An emotion which, after the benefit of a day’s consideration, seems to be the goal of his post. And I can’t help wondering what other areas of life he also regards with such fear.
After reading your post, and carefully weighing the issues, my blood pressure is back to normal. I don’t currently have a family blog (we send out limited-access online albums via iPhoto), but I’ve considered it and we may well in the future. I appreciate the common-sense guidelines, and the slightly less (ahem) hyperbolic tone. If and when the time comes, I will use discretion. My wife and daughters are precious.
Comment by deputyheadmistress on July 16, 2005 at 10:13 am
Helpful post on subjects parents should be thinking about. I’ve linked to your post on my blog, but I can’t get trackbacks to work for me this morning.
I’m calling the current crop of kids who are growing up in the public eye on the internet the Truman Generation. In many ways, we are doing to them what was done to Truman in the Truman Show.
Pingback by My Own Thoughts » Kids, Pics, Internet on July 16, 2005 at 10:45 am
[…] r. So I thought I’d put the ones I followed in a post in case you were interested. Razorkiss, a previous cyberangel, has a post on what is safe and what is not for the internet. David Boles at […]
Trackback by Marla Swoffer on July 16, 2005 at 6:32 pm
Too Much Information
This so needed to be said. There was some valid dissent but I would rather err on the side of safety. And just in case you don’t click on either of those and haven’t read the many posts they’ve generated,